Monday, August 30, 2010

Lord's Test at centre of fixing allegations

The fourth Test between England and Pakistan at Lord's is at the centre of a police investigation into spot-fixing following the arrest of a 35-year-old man, Mazher Majeed, who was allegedly caught claiming to have bribed Pakistan's bowlers to bowl no-balls on demand.
According to a report in The News of the World, Majeed accepted £150,000 to arrange a fix involving Pakistan's new-ball bowlers, Mohammad Amir and Mohammad Asif, whom he allegedly asked to bowl no-balls at specific moments of the match. The paper also alleges that the team captain, Salman Butt, and the wicketkeeper, Kamran Akmal, are involved, along with three other unnamed cricketers.

Cricinfo understands that the players named were questioned about sums of money found in the rooms, though it is thought that those were made up of the daily allowances players are given while on tour. The man arrested, Majeed, is believed to have contacts with the team though until now it was assumed he was acting as an agent for players, helping them secure sponsorship and kit contracts.
Officials from the ICC's Anti-Corruption Unit are currently flying in from Dubai, and in a statement, the ICC confirmed that the allegations were being taken seriously.
"The International Cricket Council, the England & Wales Cricket Board and the Pakistan Cricket Board have been informed by the Metropolitan Police that a 35-year-old man has been arrested on suspicion of conspiracy to defraud bookmakers," read the statement.
"The Metropolitan Police have informed the ICC, ECB and PCB that their investigations continue and ICC, ECB and PCB, with the involvement of the ICC Anti-Corruption and Security Unit, are fully assisting those enquiries. No players nor team officials have been arrested in relation to this incident and the fourth npower Test match will continue as scheduled on Sunday. As this is now subject to a police investigation neither ICC, ECB, PCB, nor the ground authority, the MCC, will make any further comment."
A Scotland Yard spokeman added: "Following information received from the News of the World we have today [Saturday, August 28] arrested a 35-year old man on suspicion of conspiracy to defraud bookmakers."
In a video secretly recorded during the NOTW investigation, a man alleged to be Mazher is clearly heard predicting that Amir would bowl the first over of the England innings, and that he would deliver a no-ball from the first ball of the third over - which as Cricinfo's ball-by-ball commentary noted: "was an enormous no-ball, good half a metre over the line." The man also appeared to correctly predict a no-ball from the sixth ball of the tenth over, bowled this time by Asif.
Pakistan's team manager Yawar Saeed confirmed that the allegations were being investigated, with police turning up at the team hotel in Swiss Cottage at 7.30pm, shortly after the close of an eventful third day of the Lord's Test, in which Pakistan were left on the brink of defeat after losing 14 wickets in the day.
According to Sky News reporters outside the team hotel, police officers were seen leaving the building with two bags at around 11pm, while an unidentified man in a Pakistan training top was understood to have been taken away in an unmarked police car from the back of the building, although the team manager denied that any arrests had been made within the squad.
Even allowing for their disastrous on-field performance, Pakistan left Lord's with unusual haste after the third day's play, with the team bus departing barely 20 minutes after the close of play, before any member of the squad had taken part in the mandatory post-match press conference.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Pastor says armed militia to protect church during Quran-burning event

(CNN) -- An armed Christian organization, Right Wing Extreme, will protect a church that is planning to host an "International Burn a Quran Day" on September 11, the church's pastor said Tuesday.

The Dove World Outreach Centre in Gainesville, Florida, says it is hosting the event to remember 9/11 victims and to take a stand against Islam. With promotions on its website and Facebook page, the nondenominational church invites Christians to burn the Muslim holy book.

Dove's Facebook page, set up for the September event, has nearly 6,000 fans. The initiative has also drawn critics.

Dove World Outreach Centre Pastor Terry Jones has accepted the support of Right Wing Extreme, which he said offered to come to the church with between 500 and 2,000 men on September 11. He described the organization as an armed civilian militia group.

"There is a need for this protection. It is absolutely necessary in light of the death and terror threats we have received," Jones said in an email to CNN.

"We have met with the FBI who have warned us of the threats they have seen, not only against us but against other targets in Florida. We have personally received threats by phone and many by mail," he said.

No one from Right Wing Extreme was immediately available to comment on Tuesday.

But in a statement sent to CNN by the Dove World Outreach Centre, Right Wing Extreme founder Shannon Carson said: "We fully support Dove World Outreach Centre and its efforts to put an end to the notion that Islam is a peaceful religion. Islam is a violent cult with the goal of world domination."

Muslims and many other Christians, including some evangelicals, are fighting the church's plan to burn the Quran.

Religious leaders in Gainesville have planned an event billed as a "Gathering for Peace, Understanding and Hope" on September 10, in response to the church's proposal.

The Islamic advocacy group Council on American-Islamic Relations has called on Muslims and others to host "Share the Quran" dinners to educate the public. In a statement, the group said it would give out 100,000 copies of the Quran to local, state and national leaders.

Separately, Jones has proposed a meeting with Abdul Rauf, the imam at the centre of the controversial proposal to build a mosque and Islamic centre near New York's ground zero.

The meeting would be meant to negotiate a "peaceful resolution," said a statement from Dove World Outreach Centre on Tuesday.

 

CNN Link1, CNN Link2

Monday, August 23, 2010

Pakistan investigates brutal mob killing of brothers

Pakistan's government has launched an inquiry into the brutal killing by a mob of two teenage brothers in the eastern city of Sialkot.
The 15 August lynchings were captured on video and have outraged Pakistanis.
In the footage the youths protest their innocence as they are beaten with sticks and wires by a group of men before being strung up on metal poles.
Police officers and other on-lookers did nothing. Officials say the mob mistook the brothers for robbers.
The BBC's Syed Shoaib Hasan in Islamabad says it is clear from the footage that the two brothers - Mughees Butt, 19, and Muneeb Butt, 15 - were alive as they were hung from the poles.
At one point, the screaming youths ask to be shot so their ordeal might end.
Local police officials have been suspended while the investigation is held.
Our correspondent says the lynching has raised more questions about the government at a time when its popularity has plummeted to new depths, following accusations it was slow to respond to floods that have caused havoc across Pakistan.

Mob justice has been quite the norm, in Sindh, in Punjab and elsewhere in the country. The killings in Sialkot are a reminder that these murderers are getting more brutal, more dehumanised with each incident. The causes behind the madness that led to the lynching are still being probed. What is clear, however, is that the police were involved. Video footage of the incident shows policemen who seem to be part of the mob. The Supreme Court has taken notice of the double murder. The SHO ‘concerned’ has been arrested and a case registered against 14 people. The IG Punjab has suspended a few policemen in Sialkot and Chief Minister Shahbaz Sharif has also woken up to the situation. As he castigated the police the chief justice remarked: “What message have you given to the world about Pakistan?” One could say, with due respect to the judiciary, that the act would have been bad enough had it remained hidden from an international audience.

The agents who promote such despicable acts of violence must be identified. Those in the media must introspect and see how much they have contributed to the sense of desperation found among Pakistani citizens today, while the police must be taken to task along with rulers who encourage the law-enforcers and the general public to play judge and executioner. The very day newspapers reported the Sialkot double-murder, they also carried a news item about the awarding of the Tamgha-i-Imtiaz to the DIG Gujranwala, Zulfiqar Cheema, for “maintaining law and order”. The police officer, in whose jurisdiction Sialkot also falls, appears to do his job in a manner that is condemnable. There are serious allegations that under his watch people have been killed in encounters and their bodies paraded through the streets. When the state rewards such actions, it is actively creating conditions for incidents such as the one that took place in Sialkot. The state is no less guilty than the SHO who has been booked.

SIALKOT: While Prime Minister Yousuf Raza Gilani Sunday ordered the suspension of District Police Officer Waqar Chohan, Punjab Chief Minister Shahbaz Sharif changed the investigation officer of the case, and directed the authorities concerned to detain the suspended DPO.
The suspension of the DPO was recommended by the Punjab chief minister in a telephonic conversation with the prime minister on Sunday evening. Shahbaz Sharif, accompanied by Pakistan Muslim League-N Quaid Nawaz Sharif, Sunday visited the bereaved family and later addressed a press conference at the residence of MNA Khwaja Muhammad Asif in Sialkot Cantt.
He said Additional Inspector General CID Punjab Mushtaq Sukhera would head a five-member joint enquiry committee, which would complete the investigation process within a week. He said the Inspector General Police Punjab had been directed to arrest all the accused including the police officials and onlookers within three days.
He said after the inquiry completion, the FIR against the police officials would be changed. Shahbaz also ordered the arrest of former Sialkot DPO. He said an anti-terrorist court would hear the case on daily-basis and the decision would come in days or weeks, and not in months or years. He appreciated the role of print and electronic media in highlighting the barbaric incident.
Nawaz Sharif said on the occasion that the killings were a barbaric incident and everyone present there, including the police officials, were responsible for it and they would be brought to justice.
Nawaz said the police, district administration and ordinary citizens had briefed him about the sad incident and revealed that both the brothers belonged to a gentle, noble and well-off business family, and they had no previous criminal record of any kind.
Punjab Governor Salmaan Taseer also visited the family of the murdered boys - Hafiz Mughees and Muneeb Sajjad. Talking to journalists on the occasion, Taseer sought pardon from the nation over the killing of two brothers in the presence of the police and the public.
Punjab Law Minister Rana Sanaullah, meanwhile, said the culture of mass brutality was introduced by the Gujranwala police a year or so back when the bodies of alleged criminals were paraded in public.
Meanwhile, Shams Ali, one of the accused involved in the barbaric killings, claimed that he carried out the murders at the behest of DPO Waqar Chohan. He quoted the DPO as saying: “Go ahead and kill both of them. Police will claim the responsibility for the killings and declare it a police encounter.” Shams Ali told Geo News that his 12-year-old nephew also sustained injuries in the firing before the episode of torture of the brothers.
Punjab Rescue Services Director General Dr Rizwan Nasir meanwhile suspended the in-charge of Rescue 1122 office, Shaukat Ali Sajid, and his seven subordinates on the charges of helping the killers. The Rescue 1122 office is situated at Daska-Sialkot Road near village Buttar and the staff had provided the mob ropes to tie the hands and feet of the two ill-fated brothers.
On the other hand, scores of young men from Mohalla Hajipura attacked the Rescue 1122 office for allegedly helping the culprits. However, the staff fled the office and saved their lives. Police from Saddar Sialkot police station rushed to the scene and baton-charged the angry mob to disperse them.


Friday, August 13, 2010

Pakistan – Monsoon Floods

1. Situation Overview

Latest government estimates indicate that over 14 million people have been affected by the floods (National and Provincial Disaster Management Authorities). Assessments are ongoing to establish the degree to which affected populations are in need of immediate humanitarian assistance. The official death toll has risen to 1,343, with 1,588 people now reported as injured. The latest NDMA report indicates that over 722,000 houseshave been either damaged or destroyed.
Details on the extent of the damage across Sindh and southern Punjab provinces are still being established. Data currently available indicates that Shikarpur, Thatta, Kashmore and Khairpur have been the hardest hit districts in Sindh. Damage has also been severe in Layyah, D.G. Khan, Muzzafargarh and Rajanpur in southern Punjab.

In close coordination with the government, partners continue to scale up their efforts to better understand the humanitarian consequences of the floods across the country. WFP-led rapid Vulnerability Analysis and Mapping (VAM) assessments are now completed in 11 districts in Khyber Pakhtunkhwa Province (KPK). Multi-Cluster Rapid Assessment Mechanism (MCRAM) assessments have been carried out in 4 of these districts.

The focus in terms of assessments has now shifted to Punjab and Sindh. VAM assessments got underway in Punjab on 11 August. Six districts will be covered. VAM teams are due to move to Sindh on 14 August. Surveys to establish the location of displaced populations in Sindh are ongoing. The strategy will be the same as for KPK, with VAM teams rapidly establishing the overall numbers in need of assistance, and MCRAM enumerators following up to clarify what the priority needs are. An assessment coordinator will arrive in Islamabad on 13 August to lead the work of the inter-agency assessments working group.
The Pakistan Meteorological Department has issued warning of fresh floods in low-lying areas of Sindh along the banks of the Indus Riverin the coming days. Water levels in the river are rising at Chashmabarrage, which is likely to affect several districts of the province over the weekend. The Department has warned that low-lying areas of Khairpur, Jacobabad,Ghotki and Sukkar Districts are at risk of further flooding. Scattered rain and thundershowers are expected across most of the country with moderate to isolated heavy falls over upper Punjab, upper KPK, Gilgit-Baltistan and Azad Kashmir over the next three to four days. Hot and humid weather is expected over the south of the country.

Access to affected areas in the north of the country continues to be a major challenge, with Chitral and Upper Dir, large areas of northern Swat, Kohistanand the whole of Gilgit-Baltistan inaccessible by road. Several bridges in Sindh are reported to be closed to traffic due to high flood waters along the Indus River.

2. Humanitarian Need and Response

a. Education

Humanitarian Needs: According to the Provincial Education Department, the floods damaged 727 schools in KPK while 913 others are currently being occupied by flood-affected people. The Department has decided to delay the reopening of schools in KPK after summer vacations until 1 September. Regular activities of the education cluster such as teacher training and support to schools have been suspended. The government has asked the cluster to help arrange fumigation and cleaning of schools affected by floods. It has also asked the cluster to support repair and rehabilitation of damaged schools, and to arrange temporary buildings for the education process to continue when schools re-open. There is a need to provide tents and other schools supplies such as furniture, plastic mats, stationery and note books to damaged schools in Jalozai, Benazir complex and Togh Sari IDP camps. Repair of latrines and temporary shelters is also needed in the camp schools.

Response and Gaps: With schools closed and access continuing to be problematic the cluster is focusing its efforts at this point on establishing the extent of the damage in the education sector and the priorities for support.

b. Food

Humanitarian Needs: Of the 14 million people thought to be affected, it is estimated that 6 million are in need of food assistance. Following the completion of rapid food needs assessments in 11 districts of KPK (which identified 2.6 million people in need of food assistance in that province alone), WFP assessment teams are now conducting a similar exercise across affected districts of Punjab, and will move into Sindh on 14 August. The food cluster aims to commence distributions in identified priority districts in Punjab, Sindh and Baluchistan in the coming days.

Humanitarian Response: By 11 August, the food cluster has reached more than 382,000 beneficiaries in 5 districts of KPK with almost 4,600 metric tons of food. Additional distributions are scheduled to commence in D.I. Khan and Lower and Upper Dir by the weekend. The cluster is now expanding its activities to address immediate food needs in all affected provinces; up to 6 million flood-affected individuals will be targeted nationwide for food assistance over the next three months. The cluster aims to reach 2 million persons in need of critical food assistance within the next 10 days. The cluster has increased its storage capacity in Punjab by approximately 2,700 metric tons, with the establishment of two additional warehouse facilities. On 11 August 2010, helicopter operations picked up pace and delivered the largest load to date (of 25 metric tons of mixed commodities). The total quantity of food delivered to locations still inaccessible by road is now 72 metric tons since the helicopter operation commenced on 5 August.

Gaps and Constraints: The food cluster is currently working to extend its network of cooperating partners across affected areas, in order to scale-up distributions in support of all target beneficiaries and avoid the incidence of gaps. Access – even to those areas reachable by road – continues to be a major obstacle, amid ongoing poor weather. Currently the food cluster is distributing a limited food basket, consisting of immediately-available commodities. Further donor support is urgently required, in order to reach the full target beneficiary caseload with the complete planned food basket.

c. Health

Humanitarian Needs: Limited access to safe water and crowded and unsanitary conditions mean there is an increased risk of communicable diseases among the affected population. This includes water- and vectorborne diseases (diarrhea, malaria, dengue fever) and vaccine-preventable diseases including measles, polio and tetanus. Between 31 July and 9 August, the most common diseases reported have been scabies, respiratory tract infections and acute diarrhea (based on a total of 288,984 consultations). There is also a need for proper management of injuries and psycho-social support to people affected by the disaster. Initial damage assessments show that 89 health facilities have been damaged and that 52 have been destroyed in KPK, Punjab and Baluchistan. There is need for additional life-saving drugs among affected populations. Health assessments are ongoing in affected areas that are accessible.

Humanitarian Response: Disease surveillance has been revived in all affected districts of KPK. In Baluchistan and Sindh, a disease early warning system (DEWS) is in place in accessible districts. In Punjab, disease surveillance has just been introduced. So far WHO and health cluster partners have distributed 142 cholera kits, 125 health emergency kits, 3 surgical supply kits, 550 vials of anti-snake venom, 5,100 hygiene kits and newborn kits, and 700 clean delivery kits. These kits will cover the needs of around 800,000 people for one month.

Gaps and Constraints: Initial requirements set out in the PIFERP total for critical, life-saving, preventive and curative interventions IS US$56.2 million. Additional funds will be required to support recovery of the country’s health system after the immediate relief phase. Flooded roads and bridges continue to limit the capacity of cluster partners to assess and assist all those in need.

d. Logistics

Humanitarian Needs: A number of areas continue to be inaccessible by road. Storage capacity needs to be augmented in Peshawar, Multan and Sukkur.Several bridges in Sindh are reported to be closed to traffic due to high flood waters.

Humanitarian Response: The cluster is in the process of establishing logistics hubs in KPK (Peshawar), Punjab (Multan) and Sindh (Sukkur). Logistics officers are being deployed to each to augment response capacity. All cluster members will have access to temporary storage facilities; interested organisations should submit a temporary storage request form, which is available on the cluster website: (http://www.logcluster.org/ops/pak09a/temporary-storage-request).The logistics cluster continues to coordinate requests from participants for transportation of cargo, including airlift operations for the distribution of relief supplies. The cargo request form has been updated and is available on the cluster website: (http://www.logcluster.org/ops/pak09a/cargo-movement-request).Helicopter airlift operations based in Ghazi continue to deliver food to Kalam in upper Swat, having been resumed after several days of suspension due to poor weather. Two additional airlift operations have now commenced: a Khwazakhela-based operation to support flood-affected areas in Swat and an Abbottabad-based operation to support areas in Kohistan.

Gaps &Constraints: Due to continued rains and high flood levels, areas remain inaccessible by surface transport means and additional helicopter-lift operations are required to provide life-saving humanitarian supplies to districts in Punjab and Sindh.

e. Nutrition

Humanitarian Needs: Though detailed assessment information is not yet available, given the clear risk of malnutrition among affected populations, the nutrition cluster is aiming to provide blanket distributions of supplementary food (plumpy’doz and high energy biscuits) to all severely affected children from 6-59 months and pregnant and lactating women. 63,000 children and 33,600 pregnant and lactating women are being targeted in KPK alone.

Humanitarian Response: Over 754 children of 6-59 months and 585 pregnant and lactating women have now received high energy biscuits as supplementary food in Nowshera, Lower Dir and Swat. Over 800 children have received micro-nutrient supplements and 674 children have been de-wormed across KPK. More than 2,000 mothers and caregivers were given key messages on infant feeding in emergencies including breast feeding. Cluster and coordination meetings are being held in all provinces and at federal level. The cluster currently includes more than 30 implementing partners.

Gaps and Constraints: Funding and quick availability of supplies are the major gaps. The cluster immediately needs cash assistance to ensure supply of plumpy’doz (120,000 cartons) and high energy biscuits (54,000 cartons) to prevent further exposure of children, pregnant and lactating women to malnutrition through blanket feeding of supplementary food.

f. Shelter and NFIs

Humanitarian Needs: The estimated number of destroyed and damaged houses is now over 722,000, according to the NDMA. More information regarding partially damaged and completely destroyed houses will allow the cluster to better plan and target their responses. While the majority of initial responses have focused on KPK and Balochistan, emerging needs are being addressed in Punjab and Sindh. Migration of people fleeing rural low-lying area is on-going in Sindh. Some spontaneous settlements are reported to be in dangerously flood-prone areas. There is also a concern that the affected populations will return to unsafelocations.Large volumes of plastic sheeting which meet minimum standards are required as locally available tents will not be able to cover the growing needs.

Humanitarian Response: IOM is leading the cluster at the national level. UNHCR meanwhile is leading provincial level coordination in KPK and Baluchistan. Target populations in these areas include local Pakistanis, conflict-affected IDPs and Afghan refugees. UN-HABITAT will do the same in Azad Kashmir. Shelter response in Sindh is being planned in close coordination with the PDMA and distributions have begun. Guidelines on the use of plastic sheeting for emergency shelters have been produced and will be disseminated through local radio stations and banners.To date over 55,000 tents and 31,400 plastic sheets have been distributed (over 72,500 households have been served).Cluster members have also distributed 200 tool kits, 52,850 blankets and 15,000 kitchen sets.62,700 tents and 126,000 plastic sheets are in the pipeline, as well as 169,000 blankets and 74,500 kitchen sets.

Gaps & Constraints: The local market in Pakistan will not be able to meet short-term emergency shelter needs for prioritized items (plastic sheeting, tents and blankets).Consolidated and synthesized assessment information is needed as is mapping of extreme risk locations at the local level.A long-term advocacy plan is required to support landless families or those whose land is precarious.While shelter material is arriving in Sindh, distribution planning is being compounded by the on-going migration of people fleeing the rural low-lying area. Blocked roads and shortages of staff on the ground represent additional challenges.

g. WASH

Humanitarian Needs: There is an urgent need for WASH NFIs (hygiene kits, jerry cans, buckets, aquatabs, etc.)Given the risk of water-borne disease across affected areas. Currently available resources can cover only a fraction of what is required. The onset of Ramadan poses increased risks of dehydration among flood affected populations. A rapid assessment of WASH needs in southern Punjab and Sindh is a priority.

Humanitarian Response: Cluster partners are providing tinkered drinking water to around 650,000 individuals (the majority of whom are in KPK where UNICEF, Oxfam, Acted and Mercy Corps are reaching 450,000 people. Cluster partners have also restored a total of 125 tube wells, benefitting an additional 700,000 people. Over 50,000 hygiene kits have been distributed (80% of distributions have been in KPK). 330 sanitary workers and 30 tractor trolleys are engaged in affected districts of KPK for removal of solid waste, including the bodies of dead animals.

Gaps &Constraints: Funding shortfalls and accessibility are proving to be the major challenges for WASH cluster partners.

Cluster coordinators continue to meet in the Serena Hotel in Islamabad every second day (next meeting will take place 14 August). A general coordination meeting (GCM), including the broader response community, donors and government is planned for 13 August. A humanitarian coordination centre has been established in the same location to function as a coordination hub for all humanitarian actors, providing a platform for information exchange and operational planning. Additional international staff continue to arrive in the country to strengthen coordination capacity at the inter-agency and cluster levels.

Outside the Capital, field coordination hubs are up and running in Peshawar (covering KPK), Multan (covering Punjab) and Sukkur (covering Sindh). Immediate priorities at this point include establishment of critical coordination structures, mapping of affected populations, coordination of assessments, liaison with provincial authorities and provision of a variety of common services such as who, what, where (3W) information. Focal points for priority clusters are now in place in these locations.

The Humanitarian Country Team continues to support the implementation of the Pakistan Civil-Military Principles (including the use of military assets) during the current floods response. Humanitarian agencies can contact OCHA (Nicky Bennet) for further information on civil-military issues.

3. Contacts

OCHA Pakistan:

Manuel Bessler, Head of Office

bessler@un.org

Maurizio Giuliano, Public Information Officer a.i.

giuliano@un.org, +92 300 8502397

Nicki Bennett, Senior Humanitarian Affairs Officer

bennett5@un.org, +92 300 850 2289

Susan le Roux, External Relations and Donor

Liaison Officer

leroux@un.org, +92 308 520 5819

FawadHussain, Sindh Field Hub

fawad.hussain@un.org, +92 301 854 2495

HussainUllah, Punjab Field Hub

Husssain.ullah@un.org, +92 301 854 2449

OCHA Geneva

Randa Hassan, Humanitarian Affairs Officer

hassan50@un.org,

Office: +41 22 917 2732

Cell: +41 79 602 3598

OCHA New York:

Ben Negus, Humanitarian Affairs

Officernegus@un.org

Office: +1 917 367 4374,

Cell: +1 646 785 9642

 

 

 

Source OCHA

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

HAVE A LAUGH

LIFE AFTER DEATH:
"DO YOU BELIEVE IN LIFE AFTER DEATH?" THE BOSS ASKED ONE OF HIS EMPLOYEES.
"YES, SIR," THE NEW EMPLOYEE REPLIED.
"WELL, THEN, THAT MAKES EVERYTHING JUST FINE," THE BOSS WENT ON.
"AFTER YOU LEFT EARLY YESTERDAY TO GO TO YOUR GRANDMOTHER'S FUNERAL, SHE STOPPED IN TO SEE YOU!
*******

SUPPORT A FAMILY:
THE PROSPECTIVE FATHER-IN-LAW ASKED, "YOUNG MAN, CAN YOU SUPPORT A FAMILY?"
THE SURPRISED GROOM-TO-BE REPLIED, "WELL, NO. I WAS JUST PLANNING TO SUPPORT YOUR DAUGHTER. THE REST OF YOU WILL HAVE TO FEND FOR YOURSELVES."
*******

GRANDMA STUFF
LITTLE JOHNNY ASKED HIS GRANDMA! HOW OLD SHE WAS.
GRANDMA ANSWERED, "39 AND HOLDING."
JOHNNY THOUGHT FOR A MOMENT, AND THEN SAID,
"AND HOW OLD WOULD YOU BE IF YOU LET GO?"
*******

PALM SUNDAY:
IT WAS PALM SUNDAY AND, BECAUSE OF A SORE THROAT, FIVE-YEAR-OLD JOHNNY STAYED HOME FROM CHURCH WITH A SITTER.
WHEN THE FAMILY RETURNED HOME, THEY WERE CARRYING SEVERAL PALM BRANCHES.
THE BOY ASKED WHAT THEY WERE FOR. "PEOPLE HELD THEM OVER JESUS' HEAD AS HE WALKED BY" "WOULDN'T YOU KNOW IT,"
THE BOY FUMED, "THE ONE SUNDAY I DON'T GO, HE SHOWS UP!"
*******

CHILDREN'S SERMON:
ONE EASTER SUNDAY MORNING AS THE MINISTER WAS PREACHING THE CHILDREN'S SERMON,
HE REACHED INTO HIS BAG OF PROPS AND PULLED OUT AN EGG.
HE POINTED AT THE EGG AND ASKED THE CHILDREN,
"WHAT'S IN HERE?" "I KNOW!" A LITTLE BOY EXCLAIMED. "PANTYHOSE!"
*******

FIRST TIME USHERS! :
A LITTLE BOY IN CHURCH FOR THE FIRST TIME WATCHED AS THE USHERS PASSED AROUND THE OFFERING PLATES.
WHEN THEY CAME NEAR HIS PEW, THE BOY SAID LOUDLY, "DON'T PAY FOR ME DADDY. I'M UNDER FIVE."
*******

PRAYERS:
THE SUNDAY SCHOOL TEACHER ASKED, "NOW, JOHNNY, TELL ME, DO YOU SAY PRAYERS BEFORE EATING?"
"NO SIR," HE REPLIED, "WE DON'T HAVE TO, MY MOM IS A GOOD COOK!"
*******

CLIMB THE WALLS:
"OH, I SURE AM HAPPY TO SEE YOU,"
THE LITTLE BOY SAID TO HIS GRANDMOTHER ON HIS MOTHER'S SIDE "NOW MAYBE DADDY WILL DO THE TRICK HE HAS BEEN PROMISING US."
THE GRANDMOTHER WAS CURIOUS. "WHAT TRICK IS THAT?" SHE ASKED.
"I HEARD HIM TELL MOMMY THAT HE WOULD CLIMB THE WALLS IF YOU CAME TO VISIT" THE LITTLE BOY ANSWERED.
*******

THE MOOD RING:
MY HUSBAND BOUGHT ME A MOOD RING THE OTHER DAY. WHEN I'M IN A GOOD MOOD IT TURNS GREEN.
WHEN I'M IN A BAD MOOD, IT LEAVES A RED MARK ON HIS FOREHEAD.
*******

THE WATER PISTOL:
WHEN MY THREE-YEAR-OLD SON OPENED THE BIRTHDAY GIFT FROM HIS GRANDMOTHER, HE DISCOVERED A WATER PISTOL.
HE SQUEALED WITH DELIGHT AND HEADED FOR THE NEAREST SINK. I WAS NOT SO PLEASED.
I TURNED TO MOM AND SAID, "I'M SURPRISED AT YOU. DON'T YOU REMEMBER HOW WE USED TO DRIVE YOU CRAZY WITH WATER GUNS?"
MOM SMILED AND THEN REPLIED..... "YEAH, I REMEMBER"
*******

The Law of the Garbage Truck

One day, I hopped into a taxi and took off for the airport . We were driving in the right lane when suddenly, a black car, jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed the brakes, skidded, and missed the other car by just inches! The driver of the other car whipped his head around and started yelling at us. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. I mean, was really friendly. So I asked, "Why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!" This is when my taxi driver taught me what I now call, 'The Law of the Garbage Truck'

He explained, "Many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it and sometimes they'll dump it on you. NEVER take it personally. Just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on with the routine life." Don't take their garbage and spread it to other people at work, at home or on the streets.

The bottom line is that successful people do not let garbage trucks take over their day. Life's too short to wake up in the morning with regrets, so...... 'Love the people who treat you right.. Pray for the ones who don't.'

A very rightly said quote: Life is 10% what you make and 90% how you take!!!!

THE MOST THINGS TO KNOW

The most useless thing to do................ Worry

The greatest Joy.............................. Giving.

The greatest loss .......................... Loss of self-respect.

The most satisfying work ................... .Helping others.

The ugliest personality trait.................. Selfishness.

The most endangered species.............. Dedicated leaders.

The greatest "shot in the arm".............. Encouragement.

The greatest problem to overcome.......... Fear.

The most Effective sleeping pill............ Peace of mind.

The most crippling failure disease........ Excuses.

The most powerful force in life............. Love.

The most dangerous pariah.................. A Gossiper.

The world's most incredible computer..... The Brain.

The worst thing to be without............... Hope.

The deadliest weapon........................... The tongue.

The two most power-filled words.......... "I Can".

The greatest asset.................................. Faith.

The most worthless emotion................. Self-pity.

The most prized possession.................. Integrity.

The most beautiful attire........................ A Smile.

The most powerful channel of communication...... Prayer.

The most contagious spirit................... Enthusiasm.

The most important thing in the life....... God.

Botanical Gardens and Conservatory | Geneva | Switzerland

The Conservatory and Botanical Garden of the city of Geneva, a museum and an institution of the City of Geneva, was created in 1817. The bot...